Half Term

i have had a very enjoyable half term, even tho i spent most of it working, it was great fun! i spent the whole of monday working on my car, fitting my new bumper and grill, and painting other parts which i have got. tuesday i spent the morning in truro, trying to complete the outfit i was planning on wearing to a close friends 18th party. i spent hours in there looking in every shop, but couldnt find a jacket or top which i was after, i left truro and went to padstow and still was unsuccessful :( but had to give up, because i was in work that evening. lucky i had wednesday off, and went out all around cornwall trying to find something that i could use, but again was unsuccessful, so came home and looked online for fancy dress shops in cornwall but there was still nothing which i could use. thursday and friday i spent working so i couldnt go out to try and find anything, but in the evening i went into wadebridge to see my best mate, because it was his 18th birthday, and we went on down to the pub so i could buy him his first legal drink! he spent alot of the evening trying to convince me to come to his massive party on saturday night, where everyone would be there, and he was upset that i couldnt be there, but he understood why i had to do what i did, even tho he said bros before hos, but he knows how i feel, and it was because of that, he could forgive me for missing it, and thankfully he was happy for me. after i got home, i spoke to mum about what i want to wear to the party, and she knew of someone over st austell area who has a private fancy dress, so we phoned her up and she surprisingly had just what i was after, even tho it didnt have sleeves, but i could use it so i was :D afterwards me n mum went to asda, and just had a few hours out, having a catch up about everything. when we got home, i was running around making sure i was ready for the party that evening, i went and got my hair cut, got all the outfit together, found my mounting boots, gave them a quick clean, then headed over. even with the satnav it was hard to find, it took me to the right place, but i could not find her house lol had to stop and ask someone where it was, but they didnt know. eventually i found it, and spent about half an hour to an hour there, until we went on down to the party, which i was slightly worried because i didnt know many people that would be there, and i didnt want to get drunk incase i made a fool of myself. the party was great tho! i really enjoyed it, spent alot of time on the dance floor lol which i can imagine was quite funny for everyone else to watch! i was offered to do some shots, but i didnt want to get drunk and embarrass myself, so i passed on them. the cake which her nan made was amazing, i have never seen a more amazing cake! there was a few of us who went back to her house, which was great fun, we spent over an hour in the kitchen, all sat around the table just chatting. afterwards we went into the lounge and sat and watched mock the week, which was really funny! lol spent all of sunday at hers, which was funny, we sat and watched more mock the week, but over time people started to leave, in the end it was just her family and me. that evening we went to church, which was good, it was mostly about songs, and there was a pray tunnel, which i have never take part in before, but it was more straight forward then i thought. afterwards the person who was running it, asked if anyone else wanted private pray, i saw him look at me when he said it, and i did want to go over then and talk to him, but there are alot of things i carry on my shoulders which no one knows about, stuff i am, and have been afraid of talking to anyone about it, in case i scare them, or they dont understand, but he came over and said that he thought i wanted to go over there, but i didnt know how to say what i have to say. i told him parts of what is happening in my life, but i just scraped the surface, which i think he knew that i didnt tell him everything, but there has been things that have happened in my life that i dont think i can talk to anyone about, not my parents, not my best mates, but i mentioned Stefan, and how i still feel upset about it, and i do feel guilty that i am alive yet he isnt, it doesnt seem fair, if i could i would swap just to bring him back, just to see him again! i had to take a break, and stop talking, because i couldnt cope with it, which he seemed to understand, and didnt push me to say anything that i didnt want to talk about. his pray was helpful, it did help to be able to talk to someone about it, but i still carry loads on my shoulders. later on that evening, me and another girl was asked to sort out these books, because the rest of the group was talking about spring harvest, but whilst sorting out the books, i found one, and when i started reading it, it started to help, it started to make some sense. ive been allowed to borrow the book, which i am in the process of reading.

so all in all i have had a very eventful half term, but it was all good fun, and i really did enjoy it! :D